As the saying goes
Appeared to simply be another beautiful evening for ball. But others, outside of our influence (and in no way, shape or form involved in the day to day running of our league), decided otherwise. Oh well, better safe than sorry, even though that has never been our motto. Best to err on the side of caution. Not our style and we can err fluently, with caution thrown to the wind. There was, however, a slight lapse when we purchased that pitching screen. Although its assembly has mystified some great minds, it seems to have severed an useful purpose. Okay, maybe we’ll let this one slide. Just this once. Although, if you have seen any of us slide, this is definitely never a cautious action and hardly ever safe (even if you don’t get out). Since there was no baseball, guess there is nothing more to write about. Hah! Wrong again. Sure I can string together a few words nonetheless (probably more). So, how about some common sayings and how we might relate to them as players of baseball. Well, what we try to pass off as baseball. Well, okay, just how they might apply to members of our league, no matter what they may be trying to do. Every cloud has a silver lining. Except the ones with rain pouring out of them. Those ones are just bastards.
If at first you do not succeed, try, try again. Well, we are definitely a trying bunch. Again and again and again…etc. Even if we may never get there, probably a good thing overall.
Measure twice, cut once. No cutting allowed, so no need to measure any more than once. Sixty feet between bases and, for us, that’s stretching it. Any further and most of us would need to hail a cab. Add insult to injury. Insults are just fine on their own. We give them out for free. No injuries required, even though they still happen to occur. No need to make them a method of payment. Costs an arm and a leg. The end result of poor fielding choices. This one you might have to pay for. Hopefully, you can get a refund. Cut corners. You can try, just make sure you try to touch all the bases (except home). Still, can be difficult, as one is always required to round the bases. May tend to boggle one's mind. In the heat of the moment. Actions in these are best tempered with a little patience. Best to take several moments before you allow reaction to set in. Besides, with the summers we have been enduring, all the moments are already heated, no need to add anything else. Just try and enjoy the moment.
Not playing with a full deck. With the availability of subs, hardly ever happens...wait, that would just allow you to field a full team. Think it may refer to something else which, for some of us, is applicable. Never mind. Even if you are a few cards short, you still have to play. On the ball. Hardly ever. Sit on the fence. No point as everyone is required to take an active part. So unless you are up there trying to prevent a homer, don’t bother. Eat humble pie. If you are still carrying an ego about with you or think you are primed for the big leagues, probably something you would be doing regularly. Most of us have learned to regulate our diet. Make a mountain out of a molehill. We’ve all been there. Stop it! It’s just a game. Not even a really serious game. Besides, way more effort to go uphill. Don't add to your burden.
More than you can shake a stick at. Don’t bother. They’re just errors and inanimate objects, even if they occur with some degree of animation. In any event, they aren’t afraid of threatening gestures. To err is human. Focus on swinging the bat. Keep your eye on the ball. There’s people hitting and throwing one about, sometimes in your general direction. If you do not pay attention, someone may knock your socks off. Socks may be the least of your worries. Let 'er rip. In our league, probably less in reference to ‘go for it’ and more in reference to clothing. Try to size your gear according to the conditions to which they will be subjected. No spring chicken. The category most league members fall into. Most, literally. Rule of thumb. I suppose but, when it comes to rules, some may wish to express themselves using other digits. Why we pay for an umpire. No ifs, ands or buts. Umpire thing again. Not the sharpest tool in the shed. Thankfully, a bat is a blunt object. As for us, some of us occasionally appear as we have just fallen off the turnip truck. Good thing. Makes us easy to amuse.
Off one’s base. Usually refers to one who is slightly erratic. Why we don’t allow lead-offs. No need to add to the problem. Run amok. Go for it. Unless it is being applied by the runner behind you. Then, just RUN! Hit below the belt. With most of our pitchers, not always an easy thing to do. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be. Oh, yes it is. Most likely to crack you up at some point. It’s not rocket science. Really, it’s not. Just strap yourself in and enjoy the ride. Picture is worth a thousand words. Perhaps, but still happy to translate. Guess we missed a good game, but I’ll catch you later.
